Wednesday, April 17, 2013

The Art of Satcha Lehka


You've done this.

Several times you've walked into the kitchen, hungry as hell. Most times, it's between meals; lunch and dinner. You're a kid, a teenager, and your cravings for food are almost unlimited. From post bu ndow games with the other boys; you feel you can eat a cow. From playing maa nyoww with the kids in the streets, you feel that Chu kong you had for lunch has but disappeared from your stomach. You crave, food, food in the fridge, food on the table for Papa. Sugary food, two spoons of rice, and a choppti of the food your big sister is cooking in the kitchen. Food you cannot touch. The last time you took Ya's Icey Bui, you had ended up going to bed with no dinner. Hunger is killing you.  You can't touch Papa's lunch; you shudder at the thought of what will happen if somebody catches you. Yet that growling monster in your stomach won't stop.

So you master the art of satcha lehka...

Sneaky as a mouse doesn't do the trick most times. When it comes to the affairs of the kitchen, you think to yourself, causing a lot of noise sometimes does the trick. The sink tap, you let it run. Only way you won't be heard pouring Wonjo in your cup. You open the cupboards and make as much noise as possible with the bowls because if mother asks, you can always tell her "Ya, bowl ly oot purr deff fa suma Ebbeh buma Jane-da", that way, Papa won't ask “ko kanla”, when you open his bowl on the table, to satcha two spoons of Benachin, or more, in hurried swallows.

The Icey Buie Ya sells is really good, yet you know she counts all except the ones with erm, faults; she always gives you the ones with torn plastics. You carefully tear one of the plastic bags. Carefully so the knife marks won't show on the ice. You remove it from the back of the freezer, and place it where it will be one of the first chosen, a kid comes to buy bui juice and you linger in the kitchen as Ya opens the freezer. "Hai, bee dafa harr de. Indil cass ma defal lakor fa". You have it at the ready, with that tiny spoon you so adore. You have mastered the art of satcha lehka...

Your aunt brings parcels from the heww she went to. She calls you and shares the pancakes and minties with you; you eye her canned drink longingly. She takes it to the fridge to cool and warns your sister not to touch it. You badly want it. "Take 5" has always been your favorite drink. You sadly go to your room to do your math homework. Chewing on the tasteless pancake and wishing it was accompanied with that Take 5. As you open your arithmetic set box to do your homework, you notice how the compass shined brighter than the silver sharpener. You think about the compass and you think about the Take 5. Before you know it, you're in the kitchen. Everybody else is watching TV. You open the fridge quietly. Not even a creak, no, the fridge is friendly tonight. You sight the drink sitting alone in the corner. Away from the light, you grasp it and felt the coldness of the metal on your fingers and palm. You hold the door of the fridge with your leg and use the compass to puncture a hole around top of the can; right on top of one of the lines. You felt the pressure released through the hole and cover your lips with it. You suck the juice of the Take 5 through that punctured hole and as long as possible, until you feel the can get half empty. You carefully place it back and close the fridge. You smile as you walk into your room with a new energy to do your homework. You have mastered the art of satcha lehka...

You have sunguff meww, you want your little cousin's Cerelac. You sneakily open the tin of goodie and take big spoons of the heavenly baby food. You then pour in the sunguff meww and mix it with the Cerelac before covering it up and putting it back to its place. You have mastered the art of satcha lehka...

The Churaa gerrteh that your grandmother made is still on the stove, it is already cool and the top layer has perfectly formed. The stirring spoon is still in there. You easily lift it and use your spoon to take some of the Churaa gerrteh from underneath the top layer. That way, you won't disturb the food but you'll have burrowed through it like a rabbit as you tibba and put in your cup ready to peak and enjoy. You would master the art of satcha lehka at this stage but that peak is not yours. It was left over from breakfast and is still half full. You pour half the contents into your Churaa gerrteh and fill the tin with water. Carefully, you wipe the surface and replace it in the fridge. Now, with Peaked up Churaa Gerrteh in hand, you have mastered the art of Satcha Lehka.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Ebou Borom Bjl


Ebou Borom BJL

He rolls himself onto the streets awaiting any unfortunate wanderer to help push his wheelchair to his desired destination. 

 
Ebou:(sights Dawda coming from his house) Son Dawda kai puss mah behfitzgerald si bitiki Wurri b. 

 
Dawda is fed-up with this handicap but realizes he is broke and is playing Saihou's team on pose bu ndowtoday and needs some money.

 
DawdaHaae! E yow tamit hamnga nehamulore foot you are handicapped, you need to waanyi sa dohh b boy! 

 
Ebou: Okay dayga naa la Shakespeare! So lan nga am si sa English exam b?  Suma raka pussal ma, amulore daralore deff. Togg rek d play warrgawarrga ak boyi teh hamnga sa bye Imam la. 

 
Dawda: Y E horlal new dem ma puss la.Sa wahh mungi dorr d barry.

 
Ebou: Ah do mann maa day waareh deh

 
Dawda: E naa former deh si digi talli b laa laa bye. Maa la gaina stress.

 
Ebou: (realizing he still needs the kid, diverts the conversation to something else) daymba chi guddi do yow laa ghiss ngai laaha konj ak Ida?

 
Dawda: Mann??? Mbahal bobu Lu ma core doyeh??

 
Ebou: kon Samba la. Mom dafa melni kunj tokhal meww. 

 
Dawda: Wahu ma deh. 

 
Eboutarpet nga nak

 
Dawda: wow jere-jeff.

 
They continue to the next street, Dawda already in a hurry to get rid of Ebou

 
Ebou: (sees Awa - Ida's elder sister - walking towards their direction) Awa!!! 

 
Awa: bul ma or! nga neh dangaa anj c ma yorka suma potti maalor b sangelew sah ghissu mako!

 
Eboubul merr nak awma worn kumapuss daymba teh maa nge sornon. (in an undertone) sa togga yu bon yoyu.

 
Awa: yow kenj wahh nenj.

 
Dawda:(after Awa passes) E belie yowpaco bu toi nga mannnitkey invite la ngai am lore wahh.

 
Ebou: Mann my Ebou Exa-lens!! Surpehchepeh yikhariti jegg yi!

 
Dawda: (chuckles) maneh aaga nenj. Pass ma fofu pound nak ma jane-dandohNatch b tanga na teh yow nehhulore puss.

 
Ebou: (not surprised at all but still attempts to out-smart the young lad) dang maa charge laygi?? Jaa-jeff!duggal nga wahh Wurri mu johh lanyarri mbussi ndohh

 
Dawda:(expecting this answer) manehjohh ma pound b rekk - naa jane-da cyorn b.

 
Ebou: Mann suma halis Ken du ko play-eh warrga warrga

 
Dawdaholal mungi iriebenen yorndinga sohla kula puss. First fool nafool, second fool na crays man. 

 
Ebou: okay am (counts 5dalasis in 50bututs denominations and hands it to him) ti-yale.

 
Dawdasa way-chiti gumbo yiBenenyorn nga wahh Essa mu puss la.

  
Ebou: (senses he may need him some other day) jere-jeff y. Daan nganakkSen Nawettan finals yi nga wahma kanj la yeah? Ma nyow settan sumayoung stars yi

 
Dawdawayeah amutt stress.

Dawda leaves for the field all ready for the afternoon match with the boys. Ebou was left with Wurri under the tree next to his shop. Wurri does not really like this particular handicapped that makes his shop his "campeh" but he can't get rid of him because knowing the type of person he is, everybody in Banjul will know about it and he'll only be driving his customers away. Ebou was known everywhere. His story being a very sad one - he lost his feet in a car accident two years back. 

The Ebou before the accident was a taxi driver known all over BJL. He would collect ladies old and young from their homes and take them to the market, collect and take The DJ to and from his "sows", take the great "julla" - Baba Njie's kids to their schools in the kombos and take Pa Nderry - the founder and owner of the Watchman And Garrdeh Guddi Association (WAGGA) to his office. Everybody requested for his services. Every passenger loved his taxi. Nicely scented and well-kept. 

He hears every news first-hand. He knew Yassin the fufu seller gave birth to a baby boy before her husband did. Yassin nearly gave birth in his taxi. Ebou told that story for weeks. He was the one that took Ablie- the really smart boy that lives in James Senegal- to the airport when he was leaving for the States. Everybody knew about it the next day. Ebou would spread the news to everyone but would tell you off for telling him about someone. He can make an oustass feel guilty for talking about his Talibeh in the taxi. 
He saw Oumie - the really quiet girl that everybody believes is a good girl - with Samba the "pone-Katt" under the mango tree doing their dirty deeds. People think he's crazy when he calls Oumie a "bandi-guddi". 

He is the only Ebou in BJL that called Imam Ibrahim "tomma tom". He would get breakfast, lunch and dinner for free from the ladies old and young - they all enjoyed his company.Akara in the morning, rice in the afternoon and afra or lahass at night.

Ebou was dating Pa Nderry's maid Sohna but she expected him to "werrseh" every night, so it didn't work out well. He preferred Therese - she was very "yormba-aferr". 

On the day of his accident he had just dropped off Therese at her house in Talinding and was trying to make it home before the Chelsea match against Arsenal started. The match was supposed to start at 6pm and he was at Denton Bridge around quarter past 6. Ebou checked his watch immediately he passed the bridge and realizing he is going to miss one of the most important matches this season and won't be able to argue with the kotors if that's the case, decided to press the gear to a 120km/hr from its current 80km/hr speed. Just as he was finishing the cemetery, a guy on a bike was crossing the road. As he swerved to avoid him, a truck coming at an opposite direction knocked his rear end and Ebou's car went straight ahead and hit a pillar of the Arch. People thought he was dead. Ebou would still boast about being the only man in the Gambia to hit the Arch and get away with it. 

EbouWurri pass ma braadaa kaas be fofu y.

 
Wurribarrki demba nga pareh clean-u lore koTei sore pareh teh clean-u lore ko next time nga ooti kulaaabal

 
Eboumaneh abal ma lee yow, sa wahhbarry naNga isil ma stool b tamit,hamnga mann maa day saffal sa fee.Laygi kotor yi aksi!

 
Wurri: (brings the stool, "brada" and "kass") deffal naanaa chi Chine bdeh! Last time yaa nge by sa loho, first brada melni last brada.

 
Eboukanj la peul kham ataya? Do yow chi mann nga first naan ataya

 
Wurri: (snorts) 

 
Ebou: (takes out a new D25 note and hands it to Wurrijohh mafa bena paketti warrga, 3D pasti ak potti sukurrNga jail fa haalisi attaya buma la amel.

 
Wurri: fore forreh kalpeh naar?

 
Ebou: yow dumala farleh, more takh dinga yaaga si sa pukuss be.